I see it all the time, a person will come into my office following a relationship breakup with many questions. Why? Why did he/she not want me? Can he/she not see that I’m a great catch? What’s wrong with me? Did I not mean anything to him/her? The questions can be endless.
Let me respond to these questions globally by telling you a personal story.
Years ago, I would go with my parents hitting up garage sales for “good finds”. Most times the bargains would be minimal, however, there was one time when I believe I hit the garage sale “jackpot”.
The seller had a pair of about 10-inch candle holders that had a price tag of $50.00. I asked about these candle holders and was told that they were probably old. That seemed obvious to me. I paid the seller the $50.00, thanked her politely walked away. She did not even wrap them up, so I carried them around the rest of the day with me.
I did hear her tell someone I assumed was her husband that she would have settled for $25.00. What she did not know, was that I would have paid $100.00 for each. Why?
Because I knew that the emblem on the candle holders was Waterford. That’s right, they were Waterford crystal candle holders, and while I did now know the exact age of the candle holders, I agreed with the seller that they were old.
She may have thought that being “old” devalued the candle holders, but I knew the opposite to be true. (There’s a lesson on getting older hidden in here).
I later learned, through the help of a person more experienced in dealing with crystal, that the set was probably valued at around $1500.00.
Wow. It was a great find and I got a beyond great deal.
So both the seller and myself felt we got a good deal. What was the difference then?
I saw something that the seller did not see. I knew something the seller did not know. The seller truly did not know nor did she see the value of what she was selling. Perhaps she mistook the crystal for glass? Perhaps she did not understand the importance of the Waterford emblem? I could keep going with endless possible questions. These questions would neither be helpful nor meaningful to my life. Rather such questions would only create an endless cycle of wondering. (Another lesson hidden in here).
Now take this information and apply it to your personal life. Just because someone does not see your value as a person, does not in any way diminish your worth. Do not fall for the trap of allowing someone else to determine how you feel about yourself. Do not allow someone else’s limited view of you, make you feel less than the valuable person that you are. No one else can determine your true value.
It does not make this person a “bad” person, it simply means that he or she was unaware of your true value, could not see it and thus did not see it. They simply did not understand.
I know there’s more to relationships but this blog’s focus is on understanding your value. You are more valuable than all the crystal candle holders EVER. See your value, then begin living your life knowing your worth. It will transform your life.
I use the candle holders on special occasions. Each time I place them on my dining table, I think about that day at the garage sale. I just smile.